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Create Awareness of Alternatives - 2/4/25


Sandy was hungry, and she was on the move.  Driving between meetings, she saw the restaurant sign and pulled in.  The fast-food restaurant had two drive-thru lanes.  One was for any customer who wanted to place an order on the spot. The other was for mobile orders only.  The Read more

Listen with Your Eyes - 1/28/25


Out of the corner of his eye, Patrick saw the customer enter the lobby.  The customer was carrying a large shoulder bag with several papers in her hand.  The customer was shuffling the papers and looking down; then she stopped, looked up, and saw the staff navigator sitting at Read more

When You’re the Educator, What Should You Teach? - 1/21/25


The best customer service professionals are also excellent educators.  Not only within the organization, but I’m talking specifically about the role they play as educator with their customers.  With all the self-service options that technology provides, customers often have the opportunity to do things on their own, to investigate Read more

Wrap It Up Right: Why Follow-Up Communications WOW Customers - 1/14/25


Dena had some questions about her water bill, so she looked for answers on the utility’s website.  She didn’t find specific answers, and she really didn’t want to get on the phone with somebody at the time and risk staying on hold.  She had lots going on, but she Read more

From Conversation to Connection: Defining Customer Engagement - 1/7/25


Maggie was sitting in the Service Excellence Training class, and the instructor kept talking about staying engaged with the customer.  Proactively engaging the customer.  Being fully engaged in the conversation. After hearing this same phrase (“engage”) used in various ways, Maggie raised her hand and asked a question probably several Read more

Self-empower for the New Year - 12/31/24


Jeff joined the company, in part, because he loved their approach to culture.  Leadership tried to create an empowerment culture.  They tried to develop an environment where, within certain parameters, individual team members could make a decision and feel confident that they would be supported by leadership. The reality was Read more

2024 Holiday Poem - 12/24/24


I sometimes hear it said That things have never been like this before. That challenges are unique, That stresses seem like more.   I sometimes hear it said That we're asked to do much more with less. That workloads are increasing, And we're resource-constrained at best.   And others often say That things are really very good. That they enjoy those Read more

Is Their Poor Planning Your Emergency? - 12/17/24


Have you ever heard the saying:  Your poor planning is not my emergency. I’ve heard it said often – not necessarily directly from one person to another.  More typical is that I hear it from the person having to drop everything and do something immediately because someone else didn’t think Read more

Empathy Examples for Everyday Situations - 12/10/24


I’ve often said that empathy is the single most important characteristic of people who are great at customer service.  If empathy is essentially “to understand the other person,” it helps so much to have that ability in order to specifically help someone.  To talk to what’s unique about them.  Read more

Tell Them Why You’re Giving Thanks - 12/3/24


Thank you! Merci! Danke! Doumo! Gracias! It seems like every language has a translation of Thank You.  Even though I only fluently speak English and speak Spanish, un poco, I – and probably most of you – have heard some or all of the translations of "Thank You” noted above.  Read more

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Don’t Lie to Me

Posted on June 5, 2009 in Business Advice Please leave a comment

There’s a new television show that you may have seen called “Lie to Me”. The premise of the show is that there are police investigators who are trying to determine what happened in different cases based on how suspects and witnesses react in certain situations in responding to different questions. The investigators look closely at facial expressions, eye movement, body language, and other non-verbal factors to really determine what the individual is saying beyond what their words convey.

Occasionally after a customer service training session where we describe body language, expressions, and tone of voice, a participant will come up to me and say that this stuff seems just like that TV show “Lie to Me”. They find it very interesting what we’re conveying because they have seen this show.

Now what the investigators are doing in the television show is something that we should be doing on an ongoing basis in our business and personal lives.

They are not focusing purely on what the other person is saying, but they are also focusing on how they are saying it. They are looking at the eyes, the arm and hand movement, the facial expressions, body posture and positioning, and the directional positioning of the body during the discussion.  We need to be looking at these factors when we converse with others. Because others are conversing with us in many ways beyond the words they are conveying, and if we truly want to understand others, then we truly need to look at all different manners in which they are communicating with this.

So the next time you’re communicating with somebody face-to-face, watch their eyes closely, look at their body positioning and movement, notice their facial expressions, view when they look down or to the side or up, notice the hand movements, and begin to try to understand what they are conveying with those signals.  You’ll find yourself being a more keen observer of the other, and you’ll also find yourself becoming much more adept at handling the conversation in an effective manner.

Don’t let them lie to you.  Make sure you know what they are really saying beyond their words.