“If I was him, I would do ABC…”
If you’ve ever heard somebody say this – whether it’s a friend or acquaintance, whether it’s some TV reporter or podcaster – you may get as frustrated or as annoyed as I do.
I get annoyed because we are not that other person. We haven’t lived their life. We haven’t experienced what they experienced. So, in most cases, it’s hard to tell people what they should do or what we definitely would do if we were in their situation.
But for customer service, there actually is some value in asking a related question. When we’re engaging with the customer, it sometimes is helpful to ask ourselves: If I was him, how would I feel? What would I want to know? How would I want people to respond to me?
I often note how empathy is the single most important characteristic of somebody who’s great at customer service. But many of us are not naturally empathetic. Many of us don’t know what it means to be empathetic. Sometimes it helps to have little prompts or triggers or questions that we ask ourselves to get into that empathetic mindset.
If we’re getting ready to interact with somebody who is returning a product that was defective or part of it was missing, it helps to ask ourselves: If I was him, how would I feel?
If I’m interacting with a customer who is brand new and has never had to deal with any of our processes, it helps to ask ourselves: If I was her, what would I want to know?
If I’m interacting with somebody who just went through our business or financial process, or experienced our entertainment venue or game, or was getting discharged from our medical facility, it helps to ask ourselves: What feedback might they want to share?
If you ever find yourself engaging everyone in the same way and not really reading the other person well, if anybody ever accuses you of not being empathetic enough, just start asking yourself a few questions. Ask – How might they feel? What might they want to know? What might they want to share? And use those questions to guide your conversation and help you convey some empathy.
Ask yourself questions that help you better empathize with others.
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