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Questions to Guide You to Empathy - 5/13/25


“If I was him, I would do ABC…” If you’ve ever heard somebody say this - whether it’s a friend or acquaintance, whether it’s some TV reporter or podcaster - you may get as frustrated or as annoyed as I do. I get annoyed because we are not that other person. Read more

Negate the Nervousness - 5/6/25


The customer needed a loan, so he walked into the bank, but he was a little nervous.  He knew that launching his business would be easier if he had some working capital, but that’s about all he knew.  He was anxious because he didn’t know what to expect in Read more

Don’t Rush to Resolve Quickly - 4/29/25


The customer is angry, so you use the CSS LEAD technique as designed.  You, listen, empathize, accept responsibility, and deliver on a remedy.  But it doesn’t work.  The customer is still upset, and maybe even a little more frustrated than when you started…why?! If the use of this technique fails, Read more

Energy v. Apathy - 4/22/25


I asked a couple friends who are much more scientifically-oriented the question: What is energy?  I didn’t mean E=MC2.  I meant physiologically, what is energy? They described a lot of things that sounded really good, yet far too advanced for my non-medical mind. Part of the reason why energy is of Read more

Prep Enough to Personalize - 4/15/25


Everybody loves Howie.  He is an account rep for the local air conditioning and heating company.  When I say Everybody loves Howie, I’m definitely talking about the customers.  His co-workers love him too, but customers are especially fond of him.  They seem to really enjoy their conversations with him, Read more

Get Your Customers to Brag, Not Bolt - 4/8/25


Here are two customer retention concepts that we discuss with some sports clients: BIRG and CORF.  BIRG is Basking In Reflected Glory.  CORF is Cutting Off Reflected Failure. You want BIRG.  You want the customers feeling so good about your organization that they want to be a part of your Read more

Narrow Your Focus to Seek Excellence - 4/1/25


You’ve probably heard companies use phrases such as: “We want to go from being good to great.”  Maybe they’ve said: “We strive for perfection, and although we’ll never reach perfection, maybe we can achieve excellence along the way.” These organizations find some kind of a catch phrase or slogan, but Read more

Avoid the Unfriendly Ghost - 3/25/25


Last week we talked about the qualities of “PERKI Customer Service,” essentially what attitudes and actions are characteristics of those who provide great customer service.  This week, let’s take the opposite approach.  What are some of the mistakes that people make?  Maybe these are mistakes of omission or commission; Read more

PERKI Customer Service - 3/18/25


After having worked on hundreds of projects over the years with thousands of thousands of individuals, some things become pretty clear. There are certain traits held by people who are great in customer service.  Look at this list, and do a self-assessment.  Which apply to you? Positive and Patient Do you Read more

It Helps to Downshift - 3/11/25


One of the first tips I heard when I was learning how to drive related to what to do when the brakes fail - downshift.  Shifting into a lower gear can slow down a moving vehicle.  I would explain this in technical terms to you, but considering I’m not Read more

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Questions to Guide You to Empathy – 5/13/25

Posted on May 13, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

“If I was him, I would do ABC…”

If you’ve ever heard somebody say this – whether it’s a friend or acquaintance, whether it’s some TV reporter or podcaster – you may get as frustrated or as annoyed as I do.

I get annoyed because we are not that other person.  We haven’t lived their life.  We haven’t experienced what they experienced.  So, in most cases, it’s hard to tell people what they should do or what we definitely would do if we were in their situation.

But for customer service, there actually is some value in asking a related question.  When we’re engaging with the customer, it sometimes is helpful to ask ourselves:  If I was him, how would I feel?  What would I want to know?  How would I want people to respond to me?

I often note how empathy is the single most important characteristic of somebody who’s great at customer service.  But many of us are not naturally empathetic.  Many of us don’t know what it means to be empathetic.  Sometimes it helps to have little prompts or triggers or questions that we ask ourselves to get into that empathetic mindset.

If we’re getting ready to interact with somebody who is returning a product that was defective or part of it was missing, it helps to ask ourselves:  If I was him, how would I feel?

If I’m interacting with a customer who is brand new and has never had to deal with any of our processes, it helps to ask ourselves:  If I was her, what would I want to know?

If I’m interacting with somebody who just went through our business or financial process, or experienced our entertainment venue or game, or was getting discharged from our medical facility, it helps to ask ourselves: What feedback might they want to share?

If you ever find yourself engaging everyone in the same way and not really reading the other person well, if anybody ever accuses you of not being empathetic enough, just start asking yourself a few questions.  Ask – How might they feel? What might they want to know? What might they want to share?  And use those questions to guide your conversation and help you convey some empathy.

Ask yourself questions that help you better empathize with others.

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Negate the Nervousness – 5/6/25

Posted on May 6, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

The customer needed a loan, so he walked into the bank, but he was a little nervous.  He knew that launching his business would be easier if he had some working capital, but that’s about all he knew.  He was anxious because he didn’t know what to expect in the process, and he didn’t know if he’d get a loan.  If the loan was approved, he was uncertain of the amount of funding he’d receive, the interest rate, by when/how he’d have to pay it back.

Then he met Marguerite.  She was the banker, and she didn’t know the customer, didn’t know the needs, didn’t know whether she could address the needs.  But Marguerite had her act together.  What she DID know was her approach to engaging a customer that walked through the doors.  She knew her paperwork, her policies, her procedures.

Marguerite understood – that despite dealing with data, facts, figures, money – she was also dealing with a human being.  She was also dealing with his emotions, and she could see the emotions – a mixture of anxiety and hope – written on his face.  She was also dealing with the understanding that – handled effectively – she could be starting a business relationship between the customer and the bank that could last a lifetime.

We’ve Been There, Done That – But the Customer Hasn’t

With new customers, there’s often apprehension.  There’s a fear of the unknown.  There’s uncertainty.  And if we can change the uncertainty to certainty, then we can convey hope, we can build rapport, we can help grow the customer’s confidence.

Marguerite could not convey certainty about the outcome, but she could convey certainty about the process.  She could describe the steps, note what had worked in the past with other clients, and share an attitude of interest, concern, and responsiveness.

Negate the nervousness.  Build customer confidence by creating some certainty.

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Don’t Rush to Resolve Quickly – 4/29/25

Posted on April 29, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

The customer is angry, so you use the CSS LEAD technique as designed.  You, listen, empathize, accept responsibility, and deliver on a remedy.  But it doesn’t work.  The customer is still upset, and maybe even a little more frustrated than when you started…why?!

If the use of this technique fails, the biggest reason is usually that the employee wanted to get out of the conversation FAST.  The employee is uncomfortable in these situations, and they don’t like to deal with the irate customers, so they try to quickly remove themselves from the situation.  And the employee usually – sincerely – believes that quick resolution is what the customer wants, so quick resolution means a fast conversation, right?

Not necessarily. The employee has to be patient to get a quick resolution.

Whether the employee is trying to extricate themselves from the conversation or help the customer get that quick resolution, the most frequent drawback in taking those perspectives is that they try to navigate the conversation too fast.  The employee talks fast.  They don’t give the customer enough time to vent.  They quickly go to a solution without learning the facts.  They interrupt the customer.  They say “I’m sorry” so early on and so quickly that the sincerity is lost.  The employee tries to end the conversation before the customer’s emotions start to calm down.  The employee takes control with speed rather than taking control with well-worded questions.

Quick resolution is a clear goal of most customers, but the best way to get there involves listening, empathizing, and being patient enough to ask the right questions so you can present the right solution.  Speeding to an end rarely ends well.

Don’t Rush to Resolve Quickly.

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