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Imitate to Improve - 6/3/25


Oscar Wilde said that “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.”  Now this doesn’t mean that plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery.  Nor does it mean that great impersonators such as Rich Little, Dana Carvey, or Frank Caliendo are always offering flattering portrayals of those that they imitate. Wilde’s Read more

How the Customer Perceives a Truth as a Lie - 5/27/25


You’re the customer, you’re asking about an unused item that you’re returning, and you hear the employee say: “The refund process takes 7-10 days.”  You’re thinking: “Great!  I can get the refund check as early as a week from today!”  The reality is that the company means that they’ll Read more

Tell Customers What’s Next - 5/20/25


In most businesses that have been around for a while, how a process was originally designed is not how it currently operates.  Sometimes this change is referred to as “practical drift,” where the actual process moves further and further away from the documented steps over time.  Maybe the changes Read more

Questions to Guide You to Empathy - 5/13/25


“If I was him, I would do ABC…” If you’ve ever heard somebody say this - whether it’s a friend or acquaintance, whether it’s some TV reporter or podcaster - you may get as frustrated or as annoyed as I do. I get annoyed because we are not that other person. Read more

Negate the Nervousness - 5/6/25


The customer needed a loan, so he walked into the bank, but he was a little nervous.  He knew that launching his business would be easier if he had some working capital, but that’s about all he knew.  He was anxious because he didn’t know what to expect in Read more

Don’t Rush to Resolve Quickly - 4/29/25


The customer is angry, so you use the CSS LEAD technique as designed.  You, listen, empathize, accept responsibility, and deliver on a remedy.  But it doesn’t work.  The customer is still upset, and maybe even a little more frustrated than when you started…why?! If the use of this technique fails, Read more

Energy v. Apathy - 4/22/25


I asked a couple friends who are much more scientifically-oriented the question: What is energy?  I didn’t mean E=MC2.  I meant physiologically, what is energy? They described a lot of things that sounded really good, yet far too advanced for my non-medical mind. Part of the reason why energy is of Read more

Prep Enough to Personalize - 4/15/25


Everybody loves Howie.  He is an account rep for the local air conditioning and heating company.  When I say Everybody loves Howie, I’m definitely talking about the customers.  His co-workers love him too, but customers are especially fond of him.  They seem to really enjoy their conversations with him, Read more

Get Your Customers to Brag, Not Bolt - 4/8/25


Here are two customer retention concepts that we discuss with some sports clients: BIRG and CORF.  BIRG is Basking In Reflected Glory.  CORF is Cutting Off Reflected Failure. You want BIRG.  You want the customers feeling so good about your organization that they want to be a part of your Read more

Narrow Your Focus to Seek Excellence - 4/1/25


You’ve probably heard companies use phrases such as: “We want to go from being good to great.”  Maybe they’ve said: “We strive for perfection, and although we’ll never reach perfection, maybe we can achieve excellence along the way.” These organizations find some kind of a catch phrase or slogan, but Read more

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Appreciation Multiplies – 9/19/17

Posted on September 19, 2017 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


Aaron did a GREAT job on the project! Working in the graphics shop at the company, he would help his internal customers address many different design and production needs. But there was something a little different this time.

This time, Jackie – his customer – sent a note of appreciation to Aaron’s boss after the project was completed. The boss – Mark – replied to Jackie and noted how consistently high quality is Aaron’s work. Mark noted how patient and calm Aaron is with customers. And Mark highlighted how Aaron’s customers feel “cared for” and “confident.”

Mark said that he’d share Jackie’s kudos in their monthly department newsletter and share the feedback with his entire team at their next meeting.

Aaron didn’t do good work for Jackie to get all this appreciation, but the appreciation still came. From Jackie. From Mark. Through e-mails and newsletters and meetings. In specific descriptions and in sincere tones. Appreciation came.

But what’s more, appreciation multiplied. The Thank You’s not only came in many forms, but many people now heard what attributes are appreciated by customers and what behaviors are desired by leadership.

When you are appreciative of the efforts of others, remember that conveying appreciation is a necessary thing, a good thing. Sharing that appreciation lets the other person know what they did and how they did it was “spot on.”

And sometimes, that appreciation multiplies.

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The Light that Others Reflect – 10/25/16

Posted on October 25, 2016 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


Getting philosophical for the next 300 words.

The angry customer. The pushy or obnoxious co-workers. The demanding manager. The products that don’t always work. The stress on the faces and in the voices of customers and the employees serving them.

There are many dark moments that you may have to deal with during the course of your week at work. These are the dark encounters of our work day, those that can bring down morale, reduce the joy, and dampen employee enthusiasm.

But there is a light. There is a source of positivity, laughter, vision, and empathy. And that light is you.

I’ve been in some focus groups of employees discussing low morale. It seems like half the staff have the mindset of “once leaders change, then I’ll change.” While the other half seem to say “I’m not going to wait for others to behave professionally or positively before I act that way as well. They don’t control my behaviors.”

There’s an obvious difference in the two reactions. The first is passivity in the darkness. The second is taking ownership.

When we have a light – a positive nature, kindness, professionalism, respect, empathy and encouragement – we can be like the light in a room. Have you ever been in a room with a couple large mirrors? Those mirrors reflect that one light, helping the entire room to brighten more than it would otherwise.

The point is that dark situations at work should be opportunities for us – opportunities to bring in light. Opportunities to have your light be reflected in the attitudes and actions of others.

Be the Light that Others Reflect.

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A Great Co-worker Question – 8/4/15 TOW

Posted on August 4, 2015 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


In working with a client on a culture change initiative, we were discussing how employees can best form relationships and support each other. Some members of our culture team talked about how employees often ask each other “How are you?” – which is positive, but it’s usually done out of habit, and the expected and typical response is simply “fine.” There’s no depth in the question and response, no real desire to have a greater understanding of the other person and enter into dialogue.

So what is the question to ask? Is it “Can you tell me your feelings today?” Is it “T’sup?” How about “What can I do for you?”

Try this: “What do you need?”

Asking a co-worker this question means that you want to help them. From a business perspective, you’re focusing the question on needs, not wants. It’s a better question than “What can I do for you?”, because the co-worker may not know what YOU CAN DO, but they do know what THEY NEED.

The need could be a simpler method of accomplishing a task. It could include stress relief or rest. The need could be a good performance evaluation. The need could be someone to talk to about their frustrations.

Asking about the need opens the door to a relationship with others and to helping others.

If you want a deeper relationship with co-workers and you want to help them as well, ask them this question.

What do you need?

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