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Avoid These Techniques - 10/21/25


We had a Customer Service Tip of the Week recently that addressed gaining control of the conversation.  One of the key points was that the focus should be on gaining control of conversations in various circumstances, but trying to avoid making it your goal to gain control of the Read more

View Quality through the Customer’s Eyes - 10/14/25


Geri had been dealing with backups in the downstairs plumbing system of her house on and off for the past year.  The most recent company that she called in to unclog the pipes stated that they could send a camera down the pipes and tell her exactly where the Read more

Be Supportive, Not Defensive - 10/7/25


[An employee on the phone with a customer…] Who told you that you didn’t have to submit that form? … Bob?  Oh brother!  You see Bob is our “special” co-worker.  He seems to always tell customers the wrong thing to do, and we’re having to clean up after him.  Read more

Some Customers LOVE Predictability - 9/30/25


I was facilitating focus groups of businesses that utilize local government services.  The phrase that popped up multiple times was “Time Is Money!”  What these municipal customers were conveying was that their time was valuable, and delays were wasting their time.  But the conversations were not just about how Read more

Find Your Special Sauce - 9/23/25


When I watch a football game and I see a great quarterback (somebody who may be considered a “Star”), he might be an excellent runner, have a big arm, be able to diagnose the defense and get his team into the right play.  But he’s likely not great at Read more

Gain Control of the Conversation - 9/16/25


The customer’s angry or upset or they have a complaint.  They’re very chatty or very wordy or they just want to talk to somebody.  You’re on a time crunch, and the customer obviously is not. There are times when you need to gain control of the conversation.  It’s important for Read more

Complement with a Compliment - 9/9/25


We perform many tasks for our customers every day, and when we’re done with a step in the process, oftentimes we will tell the customer what’s been done.  But if we want to create more of a WOW experience, if we want to make the customer feel a little Read more

When Patience Begets Patience - 9/2/25


Jennifer, the server, walked toward the couple in the restaurant.  The customers had been seated for a minute or two, and they noticed the server was walking briskly toward their table.  Jennifer recognized the couple she was about to serve, because they had been in the previous week. Since the Read more

Address the Expectations that Were Set - 8/26/25


Before the caller ever got to Marco – the customer service representative, the customer had been working with the company for months.  They had read the marketing brochures, had a conversation with a sales rep, reviewed the new customer information on the website, and read all the information e-mailed Read more

When Technology Fails the Customer - 8/19/25


Technology is a wonderful thing…until it isn’t.  The website is down, the mobile app won’t work, the system keeps kicking them out of their account, or they received a spoofing phone call supposedly from your department. If you’ve ever been manning the phones or managing the department inbox, you know Read more

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Avoid These Techniques – 10/21/25

Posted on October 21, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

We had a Customer Service Tip of the Week recently that addressed gaining control of the conversation.  One of the key points was that the focus should be on gaining control of conversations in various circumstances, but trying to avoid making it your goal to gain control of the customer.

I’ve witnessed many employees try to control the customer – both in simple service situations and when the customer is emotional or upset.  It often does not end well for either party.

So, what is the employee doing when they are trying to control the customer?  Here are a few quick examples of poor approaches or techniques:

  • Interrupting or speaking over the customer – especially while raising the voice.
  • Aggressively moving toward the customer.
  • Maintaining eye contact…with the computer – never visually acknowledging the customer.
  • Talking continuously, and sometimes rapidly, leaving little air in the conversation for the customer to speak.
  • Never asking the customer a question.
  • Swearing at the customer (yes, I’ve seen some horrible customer service!).
  • Trying to shut them down by intellectually using dismissive phrases like “your idea won’t work” or “you don’t understand how this…” or “this is too technical to describe to you.”

 
Addressing customers in this manner often heightens their emotions, results in them asking to talk with your manager, leads to bad word-of-mouth, and can be the cause of a lost customer.

In these customer service tips, we usually try to focus on positive examples of what to do rather than negative examples of what not to do.  However, it’s helpful to illustrate how we can come across as trying to control the customer.  And no customer wants to feel like they’re being controlled.  They want to feel like they’re being helped and supported.

Avoid These Techniques.

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Find Your Special Sauce – 9/23/25

Posted on September 23, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

When I watch a football game and I see a great quarterback (somebody who may be considered a “Star”), he might be an excellent runner, have a big arm, be able to diagnose the defense and get his team into the right play.  But he’s likely not great at everything.  Mistakes occur, interceptions are thrown, there are times when he passes and should have run…and vice versa.

I am wowed by musicians – people who can make incredible music on a guitar.  People who can play 10 different songs on a piano at the drop of a hat during a church hymn sing.  Great drummers who can somehow wield two sticks on drums and symbols while also using their feet to bang the bass drum.  But unless you’re a 1-man band (or Prince!), you’re probably not great at all those instruments.  While you may be great at playing instruments, you may not be the best singer or lyricist.

My point is that stars are stars for what they do, but that doesn’t mean that they are great at everything.

Defining Stardom

I’m sure if you’re reading this tip and you’re in a customer service role, you’re either a customer service star already or you have the capacity to become a star.  Now whether you’re that star athlete or that star musician or that star customer service professional, find your special sauce – those 1 or 2 things where you’re already greater or have the capacity to be greater, and continually strengthen it.

Define YOUR Stardom

Become a star because you know how to calm those irate customers.  Become a star because you have an incredible depth of knowledge about your organization’s products, policies, processes, and people.  Hone your skills as a star in how you engage people with your body language and your tone and how you can read others and – on the fly – adjust your communication approach to meet what will work best with them.

In this day and age, it is way too UNcommon for people to be stars in business writing, to be able to craft communication pieces and e-mails that convey the specific information, make the other person feel heard, and create clarity in a concise manner on what the next steps are, when they’ll happen, and who’s responsible.

Hone your star skills for teamwork.  Not only supporting your teammates but understanding your specific role on the team and learning how to strengthen the traits that make you such an important member of your group.

Be a customer service star by understanding what is unique about you and what you bring to the organization, to the team, to the customer.  Then make a conscious effort to build your star talents, attitudes, and attributes.

Become a Customer Service Star.

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Gain Control of the Conversation – 9/16/25

Posted on September 16, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

The customer’s angry or upset or they have a complaint.  They’re very chatty or very wordy or they just want to talk to somebody.  You’re on a time crunch, and the customer obviously is not.

There are times when you need to gain control of the conversation.  It’s important for you to do so.  But it’s equally important to understand the difference between controlling the conversation and controlling the customer.

Don’t make it your goal to control the customer.  You have enough to worry about with reading your own emotions and controlling your own reactions and being deliberate in what you say and how to say it.

It’s tough enough to weave in all your knowledge and all the different options and alternatives and all of your experience in order to help the customer without having to figure out how to control the customer.

The Goals

Gaining control of the conversation is something you do to bring the emotional level down, to focus the conversation, to shorten the time you’re engaged with the customer.

With those goals in mind, let’s describe the difference between controlling the conversation and controlling the customer.

How to Gain Control

Controlling the conversation results from asking questions, particularly more closed-ended questions – the yes or no variety, the fact or figure variety.  Controlling occurs when you can intentionally and concisely make a point.  When you can segue from something they say to the decision you need to make.  It’s when you can take their broad ramblings, and get them to focus on a specific piece of information on a worksheet or on your computer.  It’s when you get to the point where you can make the next steps clear and confirm their understanding and agreement.

The next time you’re dealing with that customer who’s upset, or they lack focus, or they want to talk for a long time when you’re more time-constrained, don’t try to control the customer.  Focus on guiding the discussion to an end point.

Gain Control of the Conversation.

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