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Be Amazing - 4/23/24


Watching Michael Jordan steal a pass and then dunk a basketball is amazing.  Taking a rocket to the moon is amazing.  The taste of my mom’s homemade beef soup is amazing. We all have our personal examples of what is amazing.  Usually, it’s something that we cannot comprehend, that we Read more

Talk About Yourself to Build Customer Confidence - 4/16/24


When you’re dealing with somebody who is anxious or nervous about a situation, a customer who feels like they don’t have much control, an individual who is unsure and uncertain, it’s important to put the customer at ease.  It’s important to build their comfort level.  It’s important to help Read more

The Proven Value in What You Do - 4/9/24


Forbes wrote an article last year based on a compilation of the results of research on customer service and the customer experience; it was titled:  100 Customer Experience Stats For 2023. In reading the article, you’ll note that many of these key research findings are about you – the value Read more

A Tale of Two Texts - 4/2/24


Having to get allergy shots once a week is never fun, and for Janet, it became an even bigger frustration. She had the shots typically scheduled on Tuesday around 10:30 in the morning, figuring she would avoid the morning rush as well as the lunch rush by going mid-morning.  However, Read more

The Secret Sauce for Great Customer Service - 3/26/24


I was working with the League Office for a major American sport several years back, and one of the executives asked me to describe our Secret Sauce that helped our clients improve the fan experience and customer retention.  I gave him a sense of what makes us unique and Read more

The Miracle of an Apology - 3/19/24


Unfortunate but true story… The manager basically lost his mind.  He terminated his employee on the spot.  She had told the customer that there was going to be a delay in the shipment.  The employee called up the customer ahead of time to let the customer know what was about Read more

It’s Not About the 5-Minute Wait - 3/12/24


Robert went into his supervisor’s office to update her on a situation at the payment desk.  Robert said that a customer was about fourth or fifth in line, waiting to be served, and the customer was complaining loudly about the wait.  He was there to make a property tax Read more

Lessons from the Greats - 3/5/24


I was recently facilitating a workshop on the customer experience, and I made the point that it’s usually beneficial to look at your personal life for great experiences; identify what really resonates with you in a positive way in order to uncover ideas to improve your own customer service. So, Read more

The Empathy Roadmap - 2/27/24


For some people, empathy comes naturally.  There’s an innate desire to learn about the other person and to sincerely convey that sense of interest and caring.  But for many of us, sometimes it helps to have a communication plan.  It helps to know what to do in order to Read more

“You’re the Boss” - 2/20/24


Terrence is excellent at what he does.  From a technical standpoint, he knows how to keep the facility clean.  He’s the lead custodian, and he knows that keeping things straight does not necessarily mean keeping things sanitary.  He knows what chemicals to use and not to use, how to Read more

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Are You in a Position? – 5/2/23

Posted on May 2, 2023 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

Last week’s Tip compared Perspectives and Positions, and we noted that when people have a perspective on a given topic or issue, that’s often useful.  However, when people are more focused on their position, things can get testy.

One topic we didn’t fully address last week was the definition of Position.  Using a military analogy to define position, think about old war movies where soldiers dig a trench.  They’re taking up a position.  They hunker down in the trench, raise up to shoot at the opposition, and then they duck back into the trench.  Trenches don’t move.  The battle can take a long time, and they typically don’t advance until the opposition dies or they retreat.  They’re stuck.

Here are some other, more business-oriented examples of taking a position:

Mine is More Important: I facilitated a community group that was addressing how to best use funds from a national settlement.  Funds were to be used to address a community health issue.  There were over 20 members of the group, and – initially – each of them thought that their cause or solution deserved the majority of the funding.  There were 20 different positions.

Date Conflict: One employee said their draft report would be ready on Thursday.  The other employee told their teammate that it needed to be done on Wednesday.

The Full Refund: An event attendee wanted a full refund for the costs of their tickets to the sporting event that had a long weather delay.  The policy stated that there were no full refunds.

These are three very different examples, but they have one commonality – they all start with people taking a position.

Even though the starting point might be the position, just like in the military analogy, if we maintain those positions, the battle will go on for a long time.  People might fire shots at the other until one person, one position gets beaten down, or the other retreats.

Remember these examples to recognize quickly when someone is taking a position, so you can redirect and – instead – identify common goals.  This could save yourself and the other person from unnecessary arguments, negative emotions, and wasted time.

Recognize when you (or they) are in a position.

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De-escalating Conflict in Customer Service – 4/25/23

Posted on April 25, 2023 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

Conflict can be very healthy and productive.  You and your customer are taking different perspectives, but if you have the same goal and you focus on what you’re trying to accomplish, the different perspectives may lead to an interesting approach or a mutually-beneficial solution.

If the decision was up to us, we might have one solution.  If the decision was up to the customer, they might have a second solution – and neither solution may work for the other.  But maybe there’s a 3rd or 4th or 5th solution – some of which may be workable for both.  Those solutions are determined through Healthy Conflict – leveraging the different perspectives and opinions to get to collective solutions.

Perspectives v. Positions

Where differences exist, conflict is often uncomfortable.  Unfortunately, when people have different perspectives, they can turn into different positions.  And when we start focusing on our position, that’s when our negative passions can rise, and the conversation can become personal.  It can overshadow the main issue or what potential solutions may exist for the situation.

Healthy Conflict v. Combat

So here are some ways to de-escalate conflict so it doesn’t become combat:

Avoid You: Focus on the specific issue, trying to talk less about the people involved and talk more about the process, the policy, the product, the facility.  Avoid the use of the word You to avoid making things personal, and try not to take comments too personally.

Set the Goal: Identify a common goal – even if it’s somewhat general.  It’s easier to determine a common solution if you focus on what you’re trying to accomplish in the end.

Be Self-aware: Be cognizant of tone and body language as you’re sharing the words, as these affect the emotions as much or more than what is actually being said.

Empathize: Get on the same side of the table with them, even literally at times.  Provide empathy, conveying some understanding of their perspective, asking questions and listening rather than interrupting or talking over the other person.

As we’ve often said, it’s much easier and quicker to deal with issues if negative emotion is not involved.

Deescalate conflict in customer service.

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When Conflict is Good – 9/27/16

Posted on September 27, 2016 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


Blake and Mary were in a heated discussion at work. The rest of the people in the meeting were a little uncomfortable, and they squirmed in their chairs. As the dialogue got more quiet, others began to chime-in – everybody adding their own “two cents,” and then there was quiet for about five seconds.

Jennifer – the team leader – then said, “So based on what I’ve heard, the best option for the customer and our growing workload is to go with Option B, but we’re going to delay the launch until February 1st. Is that what we have agreed to and will support?”

Everybody nodded their heads. Blake said “definitely.” Mary said “that works well.”

There was conflict. There was debate. There were multiple people in the room coming in from all different perspectives. It was uncomfortable. It was emotional.

And it was great!

Conflict can be good, especially when a team at work is debating a course of action to take, and they’re trying to make the best decision possible. Conflict is healthy, especially when that “best decision” is the focal point of conversation, and the debate doesn’t attack the individuals. Instead, it’s an important discussion of issues and ideas, of solutions and decisions.

And it’s not boring.

Do you want interesting and collaborative discussions – conversations that end with the best decision possible?

Then embrace healthy conflict. Embrace the right kind of debate that leads to the best solution.

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