empathy | Customer Service Solutions, Inc. - Page 4

Don’t Begin with the Dead End in Mind - 2/17/26


Habit #2 of Stephen Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Successful People” is “Begin with the End in Mind.”  It speaks to the need to have a clear vision or goal for what you’re trying to ultimately achieve, so you understand the purpose of what you’re doing.  It helps you Read more

Explain without Over Explaining - 2/10/26


The customer has a question, and we have an answer.  They need to learn something, and we’re in the position to be the educator.  There’s a process they have to go through, and we need them to understand. We know so much, and we could impart so much, but sometimes Read more

Look for a Stop Sign - 2/3/26


As a customer service professional, what you say matters.  The information you’re providing is useful.  The direction you’re giving the other person is helpful.  But... As you’re speaking, you also need to be reading.  Reading the other person.  Watching the customer, determining whether and how they’re receiving what you’re sharing.  Read more

When They Want the Supervisor - 1/27/26


Maybe you did your best with the customer, or maybe the customer didn’t even give you a chance.  They want to talk to your supervisor.  They see you, notice your title does not have “supervisor” or “manager” or “director” or “President and CEO” in it, so they want to Read more

Identify Your Point of Empathy - 1/20/26


I was watching a webinar recently on empathy.  The speaker mentioned that empathy - to a large extent - is something that you are born with.  It’s something that’s very difficult to learn.  And while I agree that some people are predisposed to being empathetic and understanding of others Read more

Pressure is a Privilege, but... - 1/13/26


When athletes are asked about the pressure of a playoff match or a late-game situation, many times they will say that “pressure is a privilege.”  In other words, usually pressure exists because you’re in a match that matters most.  It exists because you are a player put in a Read more

While I’ve Got You on the Phone… - 1/6/26


I’m a big planner.  Whether it’s strategic planning or planning out the year or planning my week first thing on a Monday morning, I like to plan.  I do this because it gets all of my action items documented and ensures that I have some understanding of what I Read more

Pass the Quick Impression Test - 12/30/25


Some studies have shown that people create an impression of you in less than a second when they first meet you face-to-face.  Other studies have shown that that initial impression can take up to 7 seconds.  Regardless, first impressions are quick.  First impressions are not always the lasting impression, Read more

2025 Holiday Poem - 12/23/25


We hear the word change And that change can be good, But we like things to stay same, And sometimes they should.   The weather can be wet And then dry as a bone. We know things will change, Even if all left alone.   Our customers change. Our co-workers do, too. It seems like our resources Are often too few.   The technology Read more

Make the Long Wait Feel Shorter - 12/16/25


When Greg entered the Tax Office, he was thinking only about two things: (1) How he was going to get the tax value on his home reduced, and (2) Whether the wait would be 1 hour or 2.  He checked in with the navigator who asked a few questions, Read more

The Empathy Roadmap – 2/27/24

Posted on in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

For some people, empathy comes naturally.  There’s an innate desire to learn about the other person and to sincerely convey that sense of interest and caring.  But for many of us, sometimes it helps to have a communication plan.  It helps to know what to do in order to help your customer or your co-worker truly understand how much you care.  It helps to have an Empathy Roadmap:

  • Ask for Information – It’s difficult to convey understanding unless you truly understand. Ask enough questions to understand what’s unique about the individual and their particular situation.  Simply assuming what they want can send you down the wrong service path.
  • Listen to What They Say and How They Say It – When they’re talking, be attentive – as if they’re the most important person in the world to you at that moment. Listen to their words and note their body language, expressions, gestures, and tone of voice.  Two customers can say “Are you ready for me, yet?” in two totally different tones, conveying two very different messages.
  • Learn Their Perspective – Their issue or need may be the same as 10 other customers you’ve helped, but what that issue means to them could be different. Seek to understand “the why” behind their issue – why it’s important to them, why it caused them to contact you, why they want it addressed.  Determine their unique “why.”
  • Confirm Your Understanding – One of the best ways to convey empathy is to restate your understanding of their need and situation to them. This suggests you cared enough to listen and understand.

 
Follow the empathy roadmap to help the customer feel like you truly care.

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Make Empathy Your Superpower – 1/2/24

Posted on in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

I was facilitating a Service Excellence Training class for a Higher Ed client in the Northeast several years back.  As I was walking through the portions of our technique for defusing the angry customer, I talked about empathy.  I talked about accepting responsibility.

Immediately, one of the hands in the room went up.  The employee said: I would never make statements like you’re suggesting.  Once you start saying you’re sorry or once you start acknowledging their feelings, they’re going to sense that you’re weak.  They’re gonna walk all over you.

I was a little bit taken aback initially, but not because somebody was challenging the technique.  Primarily, I was surprised somebody would consider it a weakness to be empathetic.  Somebody might consider it a weakness to accept responsibility.

I’ve always viewed empathy as a strength.  It’s a higher level of awareness, a higher level of caring for another person.  Being willing to look outside yourself to understand the unique needs and situations of another.  It’s a strength to have emotional awareness of others.  These are strong, positive attributes.

Now, I understand the employee’s point was that if you ‘put down your guard,’ if you acknowledge the other person, they may feel that they can berate you, or get you to do things on their behalf that are against policy, not ethical, or not the acceptable procedure.  But what he was suggesting was to maintain a defensive posture.  To not acknowledge the issue or any company responsibility.

What empathy does is to help the customer feel that you care, and to more quickly move you to a next step.  What lack of empathy does is to create a stalemate, to bog down the conversation, to S-L-O-W progress toward a resolution, and to ramp up the negative emotions.

Use empathy to make the customer feel better, to feel heard and understood.  But use it also because it saves you time, it keeps down emotions, and it moves the conversation along.

Use empathy as a strength.  Make it your superpower.

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It’s Not What You Did… – 12/12/23

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The statistic we have quoted a lot relating to customer retention is that 68% of lost business is due to perceived indifference. That means that about 2 out of every 3 customers were lost because the customer perceived that that company was indifferent to them.

It’s kind of an odd way to look at things. This statistic does not suggest that the company specifically did something to lose the customer.  This statistic can be interpreted to convey that it was what the company did not do that lost the customer.

So, let’s think about this as it relates to our individual roles…

The reason for the customer loss may not be the billing error as much as it is the LONG process to get the error rectified.

The reason for the customer loss may not be the content of the e-mail in response to the customer complaint; instead, the reason may be the lack of empathy conveyed in the company response.

The reason the customer decided to start buying the product elsewhere may not have been the callback from the company after the customer left a voice message with a question; the reason could be the fact that the customer call was not returned for a week after the message was left.

The reason they didn’t renew their annual membership wasn’t that the membership was a bad value. It’s just that the only time the organization contacted the customer was when the company was trying to sell the customer something.

When you think about how to better the customer experience, instead of always focusing on how to improve what’s currently done, consider what aspects of the experience lack urgency on behalf of the customer, lack empathy, lack responsiveness, or lack an intent to develop a relationship.

To improve retention, don’t always focus on what the company did.  Sometimes focus on what the company did not do.

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