self-control | Customer Service Solutions, Inc.

Affirming the Customer with Empathy - 4/14/26


We’ve spoken and written about empathy for the 20+ years of these customer service tips, noting empathy as the most important quality any individual can have if they want to be great at customer service.  We’ve shared that - in order to serve our customers most effectively – it’s Read more

The Power of Teaching While Helping - 4/7/26


If you’re trying to develop a relationship with the customer rather than just simply handling their transaction and moving on, you are taking a long-term view.  You realize that that individual is someone you want to keep with your business for months or years to come, so it’s a Read more

Bear with Me - 3/31/26


As a customer, you’ve probably called a company and heard the phrase “bear with me.”  At that point, you know there’s going to be some sort of delay.  The CSR is giving you a heads up that there’s going to be additional wait time.  Essentially, they are trying to Read more

Slowing Down the Fast Talker - 3/24/26


Jeffrey had always been told by his manager to figure out the issue quickly and wrap up the conversation as fast as possible.  So, Jeffrey was hyper-focused at finding that one key word that could identify the issue and help him to transition quickly to what might be some possible Read more

Don’t Bury the Lede - 3/17/26


Mary was working at the office, and she received an e-mail alert from the water company.  There was a water outage in her neighborhood.  It looked like it was going to be a couple hours to fix the issue. Sure enough, a few hours later around mid-afternoon, Mary received another Read more

Confirm the Real Issue Before You Start Solving - 3/10/26


Have you ever gone “down the rabbit hole?”  It involves going deep into some topic, some discussion – with analysis that creates complexity as much as it resolves it.  And that dive into the rabbit hole often starts with a simple question. Going down that rabbit hole takes time and Read more

One Question to Prevent a Follow-up Call - 3/3/26


The way some performance metrics work, you would think companies would prefer for their staff to talk to the same customer 4 times on the same topic for 8 minutes each rather than talking to them once for 10 minutes.  Many management metrics are too focused on average length Read more

Stay Calm When the Customer Isn’t - 2/24/26


There are all sorts of others’ emotions that you have to deal with as a customer service professional.  The other person could be anxious or upset, they could be angry or agitated.  It can run the gamut of emotions, but for you to deal with them in the best Read more

Don’t Begin with the Dead End in Mind - 2/17/26


Habit #2 of Stephen Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Successful People” is “Begin with the End in Mind.”  It speaks to the need to have a clear vision or goal for what you’re trying to ultimately achieve, so you understand the purpose of what you’re doing.  It helps you Read more

Explain without Over Explaining - 2/10/26


The customer has a question, and we have an answer.  They need to learn something, and we’re in the position to be the educator.  There’s a process they have to go through, and we need them to understand. We know so much, and we could impart so much, but sometimes Read more

Put Yourself at the Controls of Change – 4/28/20

Posted on in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

You have probably heard about manufacturing plants and restaurants who are pivoting during these challenging times and starting to make hand sanitizers, masks, and gowns.  They are being forced to change, and they’re trying to find the opportunities among the obstacles that surround them.

Sometimes we, too, as individuals in our work life are being forced to change – as many of us are today.  But there is some change that we can control.

What do you want to change?  What do you need to change?

Maybe some of it is attitudinal.  For those of us who are lucky to have a boss that’s encouraging and motivating, maybe not having that boss around requires us to be more self-motivated. Set your own daily goals.  Pat yourself on the back when you reach those goals.  Be the great encourager…to yourself.

Maybe the improvement needed is more of a technical nature.  We should want to improve our computer skills since we’ll be using those so much more.  Can we become expert at using the video conferencing systems and tools?  Can we become more proficient at toggling between different functions on our computer for information, since we’re relying less and less on paper?

The improvement area could be communication skills, particularly if having that face-to-face interaction and all the body language and expressions are so much less available for emphasizing our points.  You may want to improve your business writing skills – since you’re communicating more often via messaging to others.  Maybe you need to improve your concentration skills since it’s easier to get distracted when you’re in a video conference with 10 people than if you’re in a face-to-face meeting in the same conference room.

Finally, we can look for improvement areas in how we do our work.  Improving might mean that we’re more organized in our work since we can’t simply walk to the person in the next cubicle to talk about a project or chit chat with our office colleague about something.  Those random or nearby encounters are less likely, so we have to be a bit more intentional about planning when to contact others.

Change is difficult – particularly when it’s thrust upon you.  But if you can identify your own change – your own improvement path – you can give yourself some control.

Create the change that will help you improve.

Signup for FREE Tips!    Contact Us    More Resources for You    Visit Our Home Page


Service, Sports, and Self-Control – 10/29/19

Posted on in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

When I was growing up, I played a lot of golf. I practiced a lot, and I could score pretty well. However, when something went bad, when I hit a tee shot into the woods or dumped an iron shot into a lake, I would become unglued. Then every other shot, every other hole, was an emotional challenge. My attitude suffered, and my score suffered.

These days, I rarely play golf, but when I do there is so much less negative emotion involved after every mistake or every missed shot. Even though I miss-hit a lot more shots than I did when I was playing and practicing, one bad shot does not automatically lead to another. One bad hole does not automatically lead to another.

The difference is partly attitude, but it is also self-control. Self-control has a huge effect on an employee’s success in customer service as well.

It’s very difficult to talk to people via the web, via the phone, face-to-face, and via text, and to be consistently good if we allow one bad encounter to get to us. In customer service, it’s difficult to deal with the angry customers (and the occasional crazy customer!) if we allow that interaction or that one word or just that person’s “way” to influence what we do the rest of the day.

Self-control means making sure that we are listening to our bodies and monitoring our thoughts in these difficult circumstances. It means trying to stay loose and open mentally and physically despite the tension that surrounds us.

Having self-control is about controlling our emotions, being able to get through our initial reactions and – instead –respond in a way that is not knee-jerk. Having self-control means talking positively to ourselves when we’re getting ready to go into difficult meetings or hop on calls with customers who we know have issues. That level of self-control and managing our own emotions will help us to manage our part of the conversation that much better.

The idea is that bad stuff is going to happen in the business world just like I’m going to hit the shot out-of-bounds or I’m going to miss a 2-foot putt in golf. But if you have self-control, bad circumstances do not frustrate you as much. When you do something wrong, you’re not is likely to get angry with yourself, and when bad things happen at one point, you’re less likely to allow those situations to snowball throughout the remainder of your day.

Get in the habit of doing some self-monitoring of your thoughts and emotions so that you have the self-control you need to not let one bad apple or one bad encounter lead you into a bad day.

Signup for FREE Tips!    Contact Us    More Resources for You    Visit Our Home Page