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Affirming the Customer with Empathy - 4/14/26


We’ve spoken and written about empathy for the 20+ years of these customer service tips, noting empathy as the most important quality any individual can have if they want to be great at customer service.  We’ve shared that - in order to serve our customers most effectively – it’s Read more

The Power of Teaching While Helping - 4/7/26


If you’re trying to develop a relationship with the customer rather than just simply handling their transaction and moving on, you are taking a long-term view.  You realize that that individual is someone you want to keep with your business for months or years to come, so it’s a Read more

Bear with Me - 3/31/26


As a customer, you’ve probably called a company and heard the phrase “bear with me.”  At that point, you know there’s going to be some sort of delay.  The CSR is giving you a heads up that there’s going to be additional wait time.  Essentially, they are trying to Read more

Slowing Down the Fast Talker - 3/24/26


Jeffrey had always been told by his manager to figure out the issue quickly and wrap up the conversation as fast as possible.  So, Jeffrey was hyper-focused at finding that one key word that could identify the issue and help him to transition quickly to what might be some possible Read more

Don’t Bury the Lede - 3/17/26


Mary was working at the office, and she received an e-mail alert from the water company.  There was a water outage in her neighborhood.  It looked like it was going to be a couple hours to fix the issue. Sure enough, a few hours later around mid-afternoon, Mary received another Read more

Confirm the Real Issue Before You Start Solving - 3/10/26


Have you ever gone “down the rabbit hole?”  It involves going deep into some topic, some discussion – with analysis that creates complexity as much as it resolves it.  And that dive into the rabbit hole often starts with a simple question. Going down that rabbit hole takes time and Read more

One Question to Prevent a Follow-up Call - 3/3/26


The way some performance metrics work, you would think companies would prefer for their staff to talk to the same customer 4 times on the same topic for 8 minutes each rather than talking to them once for 10 minutes.  Many management metrics are too focused on average length Read more

Stay Calm When the Customer Isn’t - 2/24/26


There are all sorts of others’ emotions that you have to deal with as a customer service professional.  The other person could be anxious or upset, they could be angry or agitated.  It can run the gamut of emotions, but for you to deal with them in the best Read more

Don’t Begin with the Dead End in Mind - 2/17/26


Habit #2 of Stephen Covey’s “Seven Habits of Highly Successful People” is “Begin with the End in Mind.”  It speaks to the need to have a clear vision or goal for what you’re trying to ultimately achieve, so you understand the purpose of what you’re doing.  It helps you Read more

Explain without Over Explaining - 2/10/26


The customer has a question, and we have an answer.  They need to learn something, and we’re in the position to be the educator.  There’s a process they have to go through, and we need them to understand. We know so much, and we could impart so much, but sometimes Read more

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Familying with Customers – 10/28/25

Posted on October 28, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

In our transactional society, it’s hard to think about customers in the long-term.  But if we want to be as successful as we can as an individual or as a business, we need to view customers through a relationship lens. What do we need to know about them to keep them and grow our business with them?  What if we truly viewed customers…as family?

Believe it or not, there is a word (depending on what dictionary you check) called Familying.  It is defined as:  Supporting, providing emotional or practical help to family members.

If we consider customers in a long-term relationship-oriented manner, we could define our role in a customer family as being those supporting, providing emotional or practical help to customers.

To be most effective in helping them long-term, we have to get to know them.  Let’s break down FAMILYING in terms of what we need to know to build relationships with customers:

F is for Fiscally understanding our customers.  They are customers of our business because they are spending money or resources with us.  The better we can understand their economic situation, the parameters within which they can spend money on the types of products and services we have to offer, the better we can tailor our offerings to meet their needs.

A is for understanding the customer’s Attitude and their emotions.  Some customers in the moment or in general are very emotional, and we have to be cognizant of that and address the emotions as much as the topic at-hand.  Others are less emotional, and we can deal more with them on the facts and the figures.  The better we can understand the emotions, the better we can understand how to engage them effectively.

M is for understanding their Motivators.  Why are they with us as a customer, and why could they leave?  The more we understand the reasons behind their decisions, the better chance we have of affecting their decisions to stay or to go, to spread positive or negative word-of-mouth.

The ILY is embedded in understanding our customer’s fiscally, attitudinally, and motivationally.

The ING in FAMILYING with customers is the ING I’ve brought up a few times before in these tips. The better we understand their Issues, Needs, and Goals, the better we can help them resolve their Issues, address their Needs, and support them in achieving their Goals.

To develop a long-term relationship with customers, get to know them Fiscally, Attitudinally, Motivationally, and what are their Issues, Needs, and Goals.  Start with a little FAMILYING.

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Avoid These Techniques – 10/21/25

Posted on October 21, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

We had a Customer Service Tip of the Week recently that addressed gaining control of the conversation.  One of the key points was that the focus should be on gaining control of conversations in various circumstances, but trying to avoid making it your goal to gain control of the customer.

I’ve witnessed many employees try to control the customer – both in simple service situations and when the customer is emotional or upset.  It often does not end well for either party.

So, what is the employee doing when they are trying to control the customer?  Here are a few quick examples of poor approaches or techniques:

  • Interrupting or speaking over the customer – especially while raising the voice.
  • Aggressively moving toward the customer.
  • Maintaining eye contact…with the computer – never visually acknowledging the customer.
  • Talking continuously, and sometimes rapidly, leaving little air in the conversation for the customer to speak.
  • Never asking the customer a question.
  • Swearing at the customer (yes, I’ve seen some horrible customer service!).
  • Trying to shut them down by intellectually using dismissive phrases like “your idea won’t work” or “you don’t understand how this…” or “this is too technical to describe to you.”

 
Addressing customers in this manner often heightens their emotions, results in them asking to talk with your manager, leads to bad word-of-mouth, and can be the cause of a lost customer.

In these customer service tips, we usually try to focus on positive examples of what to do rather than negative examples of what not to do.  However, it’s helpful to illustrate how we can come across as trying to control the customer.  And no customer wants to feel like they’re being controlled.  They want to feel like they’re being helped and supported.

Avoid These Techniques.

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View Quality through the Customer’s Eyes – 10/14/25

Posted on October 14, 2025 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment

Geri had been dealing with backups in the downstairs plumbing system of her house on and off for the past year.  The most recent company that she called in to unclog the pipes stated that they could send a camera down the pipes and tell her exactly where the issue was located.  So, she scheduled an appointment.

When the technician came to her house, he ran a camera down the pipes.  He told Geri that – according to the equipment – he thought he saw a crack in the pipe 77 feet from the house. The technician paced off 77 feet and ended up in the middle of Geri’s driveway. The tech said:  This is where I think the roots are getting into the pipe and causing the backup.  Since it’s in the middle of your driveway, we’ll need to bring out some equipment and dig up the concrete to get below the driveway and replace the pipe.

Geri was disappointed that the issue was under her driveway.  She asked a simple question that all customers would probably ask in this situation: Are you sure this is where it is?

The tech proudly replied: I have a 95% accuracy rate for knowing where the issue is located.

At that point, Geri remembered that the tech said he thought he saw a crack.  He said I think the roots are getting into the pipe.  And then she thought 95% accuracy means 5% inaccuracy – a 5% chance he could be digging out her driveway, and the issue isn’t really there.

A Second Opinion

It turns out that the issue was not where the tech thought it was.  A second company came out and found the issue about 25 feet from the house about a foot below the surface of her lawn.  This resulted in a less costly solution, and it was a matter of digging a hole and replacing a piece of the pipe rather than digging up the driveway and having to repour part of the concrete.

Quality means different things to different people, so we need to define quality through the customer’s eyes.  And oftentimes that customer is not focused on the percentage of times that things go right; rather they’re concerned with the possibility that he or she is part of the percentage of times when things go wrong.

View quality through the customer’s eyes.  It makes you more empathetic, and it helps you convey a solution that better meets the customer’s needs.

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