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Don’t Harp on the Customer’s Mistake - 6/24/25


Seth’s daughter, Sarah, had missed some swim classes, and Seth remembered that the aquatics center had several make-up classes available late in the summer.  So Seth pulled up the class schedule on his phone, found one that worked on his and Sarah’s schedules, and planned to attend a session Read more

Create Customers for Life - 6/17/25


Veronica has gone to the same automotive service shop for at least 20 years.  She bought a new car about a year ago, and this is the third car she’s brought to the shop instead of taking her car to the dealer where she bought it.  She’s had three Read more

Don’t Turn the Customer into the QA Department - 6/10/25


Roberta received a form with information filled in by the company after her conversation with the account rep.  Roberta just needed to review the information, fill in some of the blanks, sign it, and resend it in order to set up a new account. She noticed that the effective date Read more

Imitate to Improve - 6/3/25


Oscar Wilde said that “Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery.”  Now this doesn’t mean that plagiarism is the sincerest form of flattery.  Nor does it mean that great impersonators such as Rich Little, Dana Carvey, or Frank Caliendo are always offering flattering portrayals of those that they imitate. Wilde’s Read more

How the Customer Perceives a Truth as a Lie - 5/27/25


You’re the customer, you’re asking about an unused item that you’re returning, and you hear the employee say: “The refund process takes 7-10 days.”  You’re thinking: “Great!  I can get the refund check as early as a week from today!”  The reality is that the company means that they’ll Read more

Tell Customers What’s Next - 5/20/25


In most businesses that have been around for a while, how a process was originally designed is not how it currently operates.  Sometimes this change is referred to as “practical drift,” where the actual process moves further and further away from the documented steps over time.  Maybe the changes Read more

Questions to Guide You to Empathy - 5/13/25


“If I was him, I would do ABC…” If you’ve ever heard somebody say this - whether it’s a friend or acquaintance, whether it’s some TV reporter or podcaster - you may get as frustrated or as annoyed as I do. I get annoyed because we are not that other person. Read more

Negate the Nervousness - 5/6/25


The customer needed a loan, so he walked into the bank, but he was a little nervous.  He knew that launching his business would be easier if he had some working capital, but that’s about all he knew.  He was anxious because he didn’t know what to expect in Read more

Don’t Rush to Resolve Quickly - 4/29/25


The customer is angry, so you use the CSS LEAD technique as designed.  You, listen, empathize, accept responsibility, and deliver on a remedy.  But it doesn’t work.  The customer is still upset, and maybe even a little more frustrated than when you started…why?! If the use of this technique fails, Read more

Energy v. Apathy - 4/22/25


I asked a couple friends who are much more scientifically-oriented the question: What is energy?  I didn’t mean E=MC2.  I meant physiologically, what is energy? They described a lot of things that sounded really good, yet far too advanced for my non-medical mind. Part of the reason why energy is of Read more

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Let Your Words Change Their Tone – 7/10/18

Posted on July 10, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


When we’re conducting web-based surveys for our clients, sometimes the respondent will bypass the survey and decide to send us an e-mail directly, or they’ll send us an e-mail in addition to the survey responses that they already provided online.

When we get these direct e-mails from the client’s customers, often they voice frustrations, and they either didn’t want to convey them through a survey, or they wanted to convey them in a way that emphasized their concerns. Sometimes they want us to rectify issues when they’re getting no direct solution from the company itself.

Whenever we receive these types of messages, we reply immediately. And every time we reply – regardless of their tone – we start by saying “Thank you,” and we end by saying “Thank you.”

It’s something that we emphasize when communicating with any customer, but it’s interesting that the mere statement of “Thank you” up front and the statement of “Thank you” in the end often changes how your message is received by the other person.

We frequently get follow-up e-mails from these irate customers, and they say “Thanks!” back to us for responding and getting the ball rolling. They apologize at times for dumping their frustrations on us. They change their tone in large part because we thank them for sharing their concerns with us.

Try this for a day or – even better – a week. EVERY TIME you talk to somebody on the phone, you respond to an e-mail, you see somebody face-to-face, start by thanking them for bringing something to your attention or for sending you the message. End by thanking them for what you learn from the conversation or for being willing to convey their message to you. This is not just for those irate customer situations. It is also for any conversation you have with a co-worker or customer.

It’s not as catchy as “ABC – Always be closing,” but “ABT – Always be thanking” can have a dramatic effect on others…and maybe even yourself.

By using the simple words “Thank you” at the start and by ending with “Thanks!”, your words can change their tone.

Use words to convey appreciation. See how the tone of conversations begins to change.

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Light Up the Room – 7/3/18

Posted on July 3, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


Maybe you are one of those people. Maybe you work with or are friends with one of those people. You know the kind of person I’m referring to; it’s the person who lights up the room. Literally, the positivity, the tone of the conversation, and the energy of the room become more vibrant, more pleasant, more fun, and more enjoyable.

The people who light up the room make the environment better, and seemingly any topic or conversation or point of debate is seen through different, more positive and open lenses.

Whether we’re trying to be a good team player with our co-workers or trying to address the customer’s issues, needs, or goals, so much of how well we do is dependent on whether or not we are someone who turns up the wattage.

The people who light up the room seem to have certain traits and behaviors. They smile more. They tend to move more. They GO TO people as opposed to expecting people to go to them. They seem to connect with others and connect people with others. They’re looking around the room, not operating with blinders on; yet they somehow make each person feel exceptionally important. People who light up the room know how to use their body language to convey openness and interest. Their arms move and rarely stay folded. They ask and inquire. They convey appreciation and say thanks.

If you want to be a great team member or provide great customer service, think about the environment that you are creating for those around you. Think about the impact that you have on the tone of the conversation.

Think about how you can light up the room.

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Of Ross, Unagi, and the Attacking Customer – 6/19/18

Posted on June 19, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


If you’ve ever watched the TV sitcom called Friends, you may remember that one of the characters was named Ross. In one episode, he is trying to educate some of his female friends (who just took a self-defense course) on a concept he calls Unagi. Basically, to Ross, this is a concept that would help him anticipate when he was about to be attacked. Once attacked, then he could use his karate. Of course, Ross got his terms confused; he should have said Zanshin; instead he used Unagi – a Japanese word for freshwater eel.

Ross also wasn’t particularly good at Unagi or karate, as later in the episode his Friends “attacked” him when his Unagi failed, and they got him in a submission hold.

In the world of customer service, it would be great if we had Unagi. It would be great if we had some kind of a radar that could anticipate that customer who is going to attack us or bully us into getting what they want.

Unfortunately, for the most part, Unagi does not exist. However, these are 3 different tactics to consider when you’re faced with a customer potentially trying to bully his way to a particular outcome:

Restrain – Hold back on the urge to verbally fight back with personal attacks against the customer, blaming them for things that have happened in the situation. Once we heighten our emotional level and try to match theirs, usually we’re going to end up having a situation get even worse. Restrain a little bit instead of reacting with defensiveness and our own personal feelings.

Redirect – Consider ways to get the conversation away from the personal attack and away from their solutions to focus more on a scenario where you are redirecting the conversation by asking questions. You’re trying to learn details. You’re trying to understand specifics, and all the while by asking your questions you’re not only getting the conversation to focus on what you want to focus on, but you’re also taking control of the conversation.

Recuse – At some point, the conversation gets too heated; it’s too personal; you may need to recuse yourself from the conversation. This does not mean to ignore the customer and the issue. What it does mean is that sometimes it’s best to bring in a co-worker, bring in a supervisor, bring in somebody else and recuse yourself from the situation. Oftentimes that mere pause for the handoff can deescalate the emotions. By bringing in someone else, it gets the focus off of you and the dynamics with you and the customer. Sometimes the customer feels they’re making progress through a resolution process by viewing the next person (especially if you position the handoff this way) as a key next step in the process.

Why you might not have Unagi, find ways to restrain, redirect, and – if necessary – recuse yourself when you’re dealing with the attacking customer.

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