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Finalize the Solution with the 6 Step Checklist - 5/5/26


In last week’s Tip, we showed why and how to Use the 6 Step Checklist before Resolving the Issue.  We noted the importance of taking 15 seconds to mentally walk through the Who, What, When, Where, Why, and How to feel confident that you know what’s needed to fix Read more

Use the 6 Step Checklist before Resolving the Issue - 4/28/26


We talk about trying to resolve the issue right the first time, sharing the technique on how to manage the conversation to get clarity on the real issue, need, or goal, and confirming your understanding before moving forward. But what are you trying to clarify?  What are you trying to Read more

Use the Customer’s Words - 4/21/26


The customer is describing a problem on what they call their “computer.” They mentioned that the “screen” doesn’t “move from one page to the other.” They say that the “website’s name is typed at the top,” and it says sample.com with a “line, and then it says ‘home’ after Read more

Affirming the Customer with Empathy - 4/14/26


We’ve spoken and written about empathy for the 20+ years of these customer service tips, noting empathy as the most important quality any individual can have if they want to be great at customer service.  We’ve shared that - in order to serve our customers most effectively – it’s Read more

The Power of Teaching While Helping - 4/7/26


If you’re trying to develop a relationship with the customer rather than just simply handling their transaction and moving on, you are taking a long-term view.  You realize that that individual is someone you want to keep with your business for months or years to come, so it’s a Read more

Bear with Me - 3/31/26


As a customer, you’ve probably called a company and heard the phrase “bear with me.”  At that point, you know there’s going to be some sort of delay.  The CSR is giving you a heads up that there’s going to be additional wait time.  Essentially, they are trying to Read more

Slowing Down the Fast Talker - 3/24/26


Jeffrey had always been told by his manager to figure out the issue quickly and wrap up the conversation as fast as possible.  So, Jeffrey was hyper-focused at finding that one key word that could identify the issue and help him to transition quickly to what might be some possible Read more

Don’t Bury the Lede - 3/17/26


Mary was working at the office, and she received an e-mail alert from the water company.  There was a water outage in her neighborhood.  It looked like it was going to be a couple hours to fix the issue. Sure enough, a few hours later around mid-afternoon, Mary received another Read more

Confirm the Real Issue Before You Start Solving - 3/10/26


Have you ever gone “down the rabbit hole?”  It involves going deep into some topic, some discussion – with analysis that creates complexity as much as it resolves it.  And that dive into the rabbit hole often starts with a simple question. Going down that rabbit hole takes time and Read more

One Question to Prevent a Follow-up Call - 3/3/26


The way some performance metrics work, you would think companies would prefer for their staff to talk to the same customer 4 times on the same topic for 8 minutes each rather than talking to them once for 10 minutes.  Many management metrics are too focused on average length Read more

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Dealing with the Issue of Blaming – 9/11/18

Posted on September 11, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


He who cannot dance claims the floor is uneven.

A bad workman blames his tools.

Blame is like the lightning; it hits the highest.

Let’s talk about blame. Often in the world of customer service, we are responding to an issue or a complaint, and usually there is a cause for that complaint. Highlighting the cause, if done incorrectly, often includes blame. But we need to understand what blame does and does not do.

Blame does not move someone closer to a resolution. Blame does not build rapport and relationships. Blame does not keep the issue from arising again. Blame does not keep the conversation in an even and professional tone. Blame does not allow for acceptance of personal responsibility by the “blamer.”

Instead, blame can be like the lightning. It can cause the damage. It can make a loud noise. It can create an adversarial situation or adversaries. It can cause us to look at others or at other things to identify what they did wrong instead of looking at ourselves for what we could do differently next time.

In other words, blame doesn’t really get us anywhere. And when you are in a difficult situation with a customer or a coworker, you need to get SOMEWHERE. You need to find some common ground. You need to figure out how to move forward. You need to find some kind of a solution or some kind of a way to a next step. You need to figure out how to maintain or build a relationship.

When dealing with difficulties with others, avoid blame. Don’t blame the tools or the dance floor.

Look for positive and productive ways to move forward.

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Let Your Words Change Their Tone – 7/10/18

Posted on July 10, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


When we’re conducting web-based surveys for our clients, sometimes the respondent will bypass the survey and decide to send us an e-mail directly, or they’ll send us an e-mail in addition to the survey responses that they already provided online.

When we get these direct e-mails from the client’s customers, often they voice frustrations, and they either didn’t want to convey them through a survey, or they wanted to convey them in a way that emphasized their concerns. Sometimes they want us to rectify issues when they’re getting no direct solution from the company itself.

Whenever we receive these types of messages, we reply immediately. And every time we reply – regardless of their tone – we start by saying “Thank you,” and we end by saying “Thank you.”

It’s something that we emphasize when communicating with any customer, but it’s interesting that the mere statement of “Thank you” up front and the statement of “Thank you” in the end often changes how your message is received by the other person.

We frequently get follow-up e-mails from these irate customers, and they say “Thanks!” back to us for responding and getting the ball rolling. They apologize at times for dumping their frustrations on us. They change their tone in large part because we thank them for sharing their concerns with us.

Try this for a day or – even better – a week. EVERY TIME you talk to somebody on the phone, you respond to an e-mail, you see somebody face-to-face, start by thanking them for bringing something to your attention or for sending you the message. End by thanking them for what you learn from the conversation or for being willing to convey their message to you. This is not just for those irate customer situations. It is also for any conversation you have with a co-worker or customer.

It’s not as catchy as “ABC – Always be closing,” but “ABT – Always be thanking” can have a dramatic effect on others…and maybe even yourself.

By using the simple words “Thank you” at the start and by ending with “Thanks!”, your words can change their tone.

Use words to convey appreciation. See how the tone of conversations begins to change.

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Of Ross, Unagi, and the Attacking Customer – 6/19/18

Posted on June 19, 2018 in Customer Service Tip of the Week Please leave a comment


If you’ve ever watched the TV sitcom called Friends, you may remember that one of the characters was named Ross. In one episode, he is trying to educate some of his female friends (who just took a self-defense course) on a concept he calls Unagi. Basically, to Ross, this is a concept that would help him anticipate when he was about to be attacked. Once attacked, then he could use his karate. Of course, Ross got his terms confused; he should have said Zanshin; instead he used Unagi – a Japanese word for freshwater eel.

Ross also wasn’t particularly good at Unagi or karate, as later in the episode his Friends “attacked” him when his Unagi failed, and they got him in a submission hold.

In the world of customer service, it would be great if we had Unagi. It would be great if we had some kind of a radar that could anticipate that customer who is going to attack us or bully us into getting what they want.

Unfortunately, for the most part, Unagi does not exist. However, these are 3 different tactics to consider when you’re faced with a customer potentially trying to bully his way to a particular outcome:

Restrain – Hold back on the urge to verbally fight back with personal attacks against the customer, blaming them for things that have happened in the situation. Once we heighten our emotional level and try to match theirs, usually we’re going to end up having a situation get even worse. Restrain a little bit instead of reacting with defensiveness and our own personal feelings.

Redirect – Consider ways to get the conversation away from the personal attack and away from their solutions to focus more on a scenario where you are redirecting the conversation by asking questions. You’re trying to learn details. You’re trying to understand specifics, and all the while by asking your questions you’re not only getting the conversation to focus on what you want to focus on, but you’re also taking control of the conversation.

Recuse – At some point, the conversation gets too heated; it’s too personal; you may need to recuse yourself from the conversation. This does not mean to ignore the customer and the issue. What it does mean is that sometimes it’s best to bring in a co-worker, bring in a supervisor, bring in somebody else and recuse yourself from the situation. Oftentimes that mere pause for the handoff can deescalate the emotions. By bringing in someone else, it gets the focus off of you and the dynamics with you and the customer. Sometimes the customer feels they’re making progress through a resolution process by viewing the next person (especially if you position the handoff this way) as a key next step in the process.

Why you might not have Unagi, find ways to restrain, redirect, and – if necessary – recuse yourself when you’re dealing with the attacking customer.

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